Saturday, December 10, 2011

The Chicken Who Died for my Sins

My darling fans, fear not, I have returned.

Last night I had an inexplicable craving for lasagna and so, upon leaving the house to meet a boy for drugs (yes, drugs, that's right! I don't have health insurance and this particular boy has access) I decided that I would after go to the supermarket.

"Here," he said, "pertussis is going around. I just want you to get better." He handed me a card of pills.

Wow. And he was totally hot. Thick medium blonde hair and crystal blue eyes, he drove a black Mercedes. He wore glasses. A total dream and a half.

"Now you call me or text me if you have any questions," he said.

"Okay."

His name is Theodore.

He's a doctor.

Can you believe it?

But back to the food!

I went into Frye's and right to the freezer section, hmm. Lasagna or Chicken parm? Chicken parm!

The next day, for second breakfast (about 9-ish) I cooked said Chicken parm. It was a Weight Watchers (TM) entree. When it was time to eat it (5 min, 30 seconds of cooking 2 minutes of waiting) I found a cold piece in the chicken-no matter, it appeared to be prec00ked but the taste was NOT Italian! The dish has a distinct Mexican flavor about it. Now I don't know about you, but having hailed from San Diego has inured me to Mexican. It's okay if you WANT Mexican, but I wanted ITALIAN!!!!

Sorry Weight Watchers(TM)-you need to adjust your directions and fix your flavorings.

I remain,

Hilda Stinson

No comments:

Post a Comment