Lusting in my Heart

I believe it was a 1976 issue of Playboy where Jimmy Carter, then the President of the United States, confessed to "lusting in my heart." Over women.

In my case, we are talking about food. Women are nothing special. Well, most of them aren't. But then, I'm not really very gay, so I suppose that I'm being entirely unfair. But I digress.

I was at Ralph's today, after having gone to Trader Joe's, which can be a minefield of temptation. The trick is to know what you want before you even go in, rush through the shopping and not buy anything sinful. I can do that. Sort of (today I purchased some ginger chews..oh..dios mio. But it's for my bronchitus. It might help). My fingers tremble with anticipation as I peel the wrapper off and then the powdered sugar coating hits my tongue and I am helpless. I allow myself three.

But back to Ralph's. I had two reasons for going to Ralph's today: 1. to get cash to so I can go to the Chinese Pharmacy to purchase some Zhi bai di huang wan and 2. to use use up a really good Healthy Choice coupon. I got two of my favorites: the chicken strips and the meatloaf. And then I walked down the cookie isle, but I wasn't going to look at the cookies, no, I was here to gaze with great lust upon the donuts.

The donuts sat with the Hostess cupcakes (which I also love) and beckoned to me, "You know you want me. You know you want to take a bite of us. And ohhhh. Check out us chocolate coated ones too. We are especially delicious. Oh baby. Come and TAKE US!"

I ignored the donuts.

I could tell it made them mad, but I could not afford to bury my face into an entire box, my face coated with donut powder and chocolate crustings. No. I could only lust in my heart.

Lustfully yours, I remain,

Hilda Stinson