Fan Mail

My darling fans, every so often I deviate. Isn't that the point?

I got a complaint that my last KFC entry was "ghetto porn"-but that the following column was perfectly fine. Well all right, but if we can't be ghetto, then what else is off limits?

Space is not off limits. We know this because the Captain comes FROM, ergo not off limits.

Work IS off limits. Who needs a lawsuit? (Unless it's YOUR work)

So let's hear it, my darling fans. Where shall I wander next? What adventures shall I embark upon?

And last, yes, I will be accepting gifts of Adidas(TM) socks. The kind made from CoolMax(TM). I believe they carry them in the Adidas(TM) store in San Fran. And while you're there, eat some steak tartare for me. And let me know how truly divine it is!

But no flowers, because they die, unlike all of you, who are not allowed to.

I mean it.

I remain,

Hilda Stinson